J2J V: Tokyo, Over and Out!

It's taken me days to find the time or energy to follow up with the final part of the Japan trip and to wrap up my thoughts. I'm still exhausted, but here goes on somewhat of a conclusion to our journey...

After leaving the serenity of Koyasan, we climbed back aboard the local bus, took the cable car, took the local train, grabbed an express train, sped along on the shinkansen (bullet train) and navigated the subway system that took us, 8 hours later, to our final destination, Tokyo. Unlike the rest of Japan that I had experienced, Tokyo was very Western feeling. Skyscrapers abounded in every direction, neon signs clamored for my attention and the subway system was like navigating along the noodles in a pile of spaghetti. I became wary and agitated, worried about pickpockets and speeding taxis. Basically, it felt like I was back in the US. But with a language barrier.

After navigating the subway to our approximate area of the city, we walked around cluelessly for about half an hour before giving up and getting a cab. Navigating Tokyo is next to impossible - most streets don't have names. Addresses go like this... 2-3-1 Yoyogi (our hotel's address). This means that it's in Yoyogi area, is in chome (or grid) 2, block 3, building 1. This may seem to make some sense, until you throw into the mix that blocks, buildings and chomes do not go in any order that a foreigner would understand. They were numbered as they were built. So 2 may be next to 32. Cab drivers don't have a clue - they rely on GPS. Locals don't know anything except their very small, local area of blocks. It's frustrating as heck to get around there.

Tokyo is a metropolis just like every other I've ever been to. Nothing really stood out to me. Perhaps it was the weariness of our long trip. Maybe it was my extreme homesickness for my girls and furry children. Or it could be that I was just sick of the language barriers, foreign food and lack of wi-fi. I felt disconnected and alone, drowning in a vast sea of strangers.

We did manage to get out and discover shabu-shabu and sukiyaki. We ate from a big bowl of boiling broth, into which we added vegetables from a salad bar, beef and pork, stirring and boiling it as we ate. I broke my meat ban big time, and payed for it dearly, but it felt great to have a meal I enjoyed eating after days of tempura'd leaves, boiled tofu and beans.

We also traveled across the city to the Sensoji Temple in Asakusa, which was built in 645 (and rebuilt after the Tokyo bombing of 1945). The story goes that in 628, two fisherman brothers netted a golden statue of Kannon, goddess of mercy. Sensoji was built to house the statue, and thousands flock there to seek her favor by burning incense.

The entrance to the temple boasted an impressive gate with a gigantic paper lantern hanging from its ballast. After walking through the gate and admiring its impressively fearful gaurdians, I was transported into a lane filled with colorful flags, legions of souvenir peddlers and a carnival-like atmosphere. The lane ended at the main gate to the temple, alongside which stood an impressive five-story pagoda.

We stopped inside the main gate to get our fortunes, which is accomplished by dropping 100¥ into a slot, shaking a container with sticks in it until one alls out, matching the Japanese-scripted number on the stick to a numbered drawer and removing your fortune. I pulled my drawer, and was instantly surrounded by onlookers oohing and ahhing - apparently I had pulled the best fortune one can obtain. Jason's luck was very different - he got the worst one possible. It was funny that ours were so different, with over 30-some in the mix that we could have gotten!

On our way out of Asakusa, we stumbled across a ferry dock, and on a whim decided to take a ride and see where it went. It took us to the Southern business district near Roppingi, where we were met by salarymen just getting off of work. We followed the masses into a subway station, stopping for a bottle of "Happy Hoppy" (couldn't resist that one!) in one of the plethora of eating and dining establishments in the underground malls that are scattered throughout Tokyo.

The final day we managed to drag ourselves out of bed at 5:00 a.m. to head down to Tsukiji fish market, one of the largest in the world. I'd be lying to say we were thrilled about going. But, it was our last day there, and it was one of those things I thought I'd be disappointed about not seeing when I returned, so on we trudged. Well, actually we just called a cab. Though we knew it would cost about $30 each way, we were both too tired to try navigating it.

The market was impressive, with fishermen who had clearly been at sea quite some time scurrying around in their big, black boots. Deliverymen drove little carts like bats out of hell throughout the narrow corridors, and it was hard to stay out of their way. We finally found the auction and watched the strange hand signals, auctioneer calls and fish-tagging take place. Then we stopped at a little dive for some very-fresh sushi. It was good, but to be honest, sushi at 6 a.m. after more than a week of raw fish almost daily about did us in. Neither of us could finish our orders. I accidentally ate some fermented fish eggs which I think I can still taste from time to time in the back of my mouth.

We rushed back to the hotel, caught a shuttle (2-hours!) to the airport, rode a delayed flight out to Chicago, missed our connecting, landed another flight to DC, arrived, found our luggage had not, and waited around for an hour or so for Jason's dad to pick us up. Our luggage arrived the next evening on our doorstep. Thank you, United, for that special bonus at the end of a long trip.

All in all, Japan was a wonderful experience. I definitely recommend going. I do have some suggestions if you do decide to go, though:

• Don't waste time learning too much Japanese. All they say to you is thank you, please, hello, goodbye anyway (remember, you are American, and therefore a Barbarian). Add in a request to find the bathroom "toire wa domo desu ka" in the mix, and you're good to go. Yes, you'll have a tough time. But really, you'll have a tough time even if you learn multiple phrases. It's just that different.
• Ignore the advice about bringing lots of tissues to use as toilet paper. Everywhere I went, even public bathrooms in remote places, had toilet paper. Chalk that one up to myth.
  
• Buy Frommer's at least a month or two before traveling. It was our constant companion on this trip.
• Don't blow your nose in public. Or put your hands in your pockets. Or cross your arms. Or stare. Or wear shoes into a temple. A voice of experience, people.

Random observations

• Despite having outstanding technology in terms of useless gizmos and extreme toiletry, there is no wi-fi to be found in all of Japan, apparently.
  
• About 10% of Japanese women wear kimonos. I’m not sure why. Is it religious? For certain jobs? Or just a preference?
• Men can push women around on the subways, as well as children. And that's ok. By them, at least. Not by me.
  
• It's not fun to go to a foreign country where everyone is tiny when you are bordering ginormous and have huge breasts. You get openly stared at. Or at least your breasts do, because they're at everyone else's eye level.
• It’s a more extreme culture shock than anything I have ever experienced before. Because there are few roman characters on maps and signs, it’s very hard to find what you’re looking for. Thankfully, I was addicted to mahjong on my computer for years, so I eventually matched the symbols to our guide maps/books, at least enough to navigate and find food.
  
• English-worded shirts (with Roman letters) are extremely popular, but many of the sayings make no sense at all to us. Visit Engrish.com for some great examples. They're not exaggerating in the least.
• Stop to read the English translations of signs when they are present. Hilarious. See photo at right for an example.
  
• If you don't know how to say it in Japanese, try saying it in English, replacing the l's with r's. E.g. Coka-Cora. Seriously. Sank-you is also quite common. Many said "sank you" to us repeatedly.
  

Anyway, we're home, and I'm recovering. It was an exhausting trip, and there's no rest for the weary when you're a mommy that's been away for more than a week. Not to mention my contractor woes, which seem to be coming to conclusion early next week. I'm beat, and so happy to be back at home, with my children, animals and my pacifier (wi-fi and my MacBook Pro). Heaven.

J2J IV: Koyasan has taken my heart

Our next adventure took us to Osaka, where we were completely confused by a new subway and rail system. We finally found the right line, which provided a two-hour train ride (both express and local) to the base of Mount Koya, or Koyasan as the Japanese call it. From there, we took a cable car unlike any other I'd seen up the side of the mountain, hopped in a bus and landed about 20 minutes later at our bus stop. It was breathtaking – gigantic hydrangeas and butterfly bushes lined our way, with bright bursts of lilies and the occasional glimpse of a water fall.

The mountain boasts more than 115 Shingon Buddhist temples in the village of Koya (5,000 people, 1,000 of which are monks), which was founded by Kobo Daishi (Kukai) about 1,200 years ago, who is said to still rest there in meditation.

Upon reaching our bus stop, we were immersed in a small village unlike anything else we had experienced in Japan thus far. We chose to stay at the Shojoshin-in Temple, a beautiful and ancient place. It was easy to find our host temple for the night, which was conveniently located at the entrance of Okunoin, a pathway that leads to the great Kobo Daishi’s shrine.

To be honest, we hadn’t a clue what to do upon arrival at the temple. We blustered around in search of the correct entrance, then figured out where our shoes went (no shoes in the temple). Thankfully we ran into some English-speaking guests who called an assistant to check us in.

We were almost an hour past dinner time (our train got stopped due to either a thunderstorm, accident or combination of the two – we had no idea what the explanation was as it was given in Japanese), but we still were able to receive our traditional vegetarian meal. Neither of us know most of the components of it, but it did contain beans, vegetable tempura, pickled vegetables, tofu, soup, watermelon and lots of seaweed/kelp type things. Some was very, very good. Others I am happy to have experienced but will never try again.

After dinner, we headed out to Okunoin, as we had read that it was something that must be seen at night as well as during the day. It was an incredible experience. The recent downpour had left the tombstones and monuments glistening, and the fresh air was tinged with incense and cedar. The shear number of carved stones was incredible... around 200,000 line the 1.6 km walk to the temple and shrine. We couldn’t see beyond the first few headstones, but knew that the depth of them must be incredible. I felt at peace and in awe to be walking down the very same path where emperors, samaurai and feudal lords had walked hundreds of years before. The path was lined with stone lanterns to lead the way, with trees leaning over the pathway, frogs creaking over head and gentle breezes tickling the back of your neck.

After our evening stroll, we headed back to our room, which opened onto a beautiful little Japanese garden. Our room was traditionally Japanese, complete with tatami mats, fusuma (sliding, paper lined doors) and communal bathing areas. We slept on futons on the floor, with the fusuma open onto a hillside Japanese garden, bringing in a nice breeze. I slept more soundly than I had the entire time here in Japan, lulled to sleep by the creaking boards, sweet incense and sounds of the wind outside. It's hard to describe the inner peace I felt that night - not just relief from the weariness of travel and modern life, but from some very personal and deep part inside me. In this foreign place so very different from my usual surroundings, my religious experiences or anything else I hold as my personal norms, it was strange to feel an undeniable sense of belonging.

In the morning I was woken by a bell calling us to prayers at 5:50 a.m. (Jason hadn't found the same inner peace, and had barely slept all night!) We splashed cold water on our faces and stumbled down with the rest of the tourists and henro (pilgrims) to watch the morning prayers, complete with chanting monks, strange rituals I did not understand, banging of cymbals and the ringing of a bell. Candles and incense burned, and the air around us shimmered with the light reflecting from the gold adornments, shiny black furnishings and elaborately woven rugs. It was magical, and I found myself lost in meditation, despite the language barrier and my lack of understanding. I was all too disappointed when it ended after what seemed like such a short time, but my feet were grateful – they were close to falling asleep. Sitting on the floor on tatami in the proper manner takes practice and flexibility, neither of which I’ve had. Time to take up yoga again when I get home.

We next were led to breakfast, which once again was served kaiseki style. We had seaweed, more tofu, more beans, more green stuff I couldn’t place. The tea was different than the previous night's green tea – I think Oolong? Again, I’m clueless as to what it was.

With the rhythms of the monks' chanting still ringing in my head, we headed out once again to walk to path in Okunoin. Sunlight streamed through the trees, and it was breathtakingly, achingly beautiful. The kind of beauty that you know you will experience only a few times in your life. The kind that makes tears spring to your eyes. I felt such peace and happiness in just being present and being there. It was incredible how much we could not see during the night that was visible the next morning. The path was much more populated, and I enjoyed watching the rituals at the various shrines, as well as the temple. Henro from across the country were there, easily identifiable by their white smocks and (sometimes) bamboo hats. We walked around Kobo Daishi's shrine, but were quickly shooed out of a side area – I guess we weren’t supposed to be there. Luckily we’re Americans, which equals barbarians to the Japanese, so I think we will be forgiven by the ancestors and those present in flesh as well!

I could not resist the temptation any longer to reach out and touch the mammoth trees, many of them hundreds of years old. The textures of the rough, flaking bark contrasted with the spongy, incredibly soft moss are now imprinted on my soul, along with the sights, sounds and smells of this incredible place.

This was one of those experiences I know I will carry in my heart until the day I die. It was all at once mystical, peaceful, magical, inspiring and awesome. If you ever get the chance to go to Koyasan, DO IT! No matter what your religious background, there is something that will undeniably move your spirit in ways you have not felt before. It is incredible.

Journe to Japan III: Kyoto and the Geisha

After three dull days of meetings in Otsu at Lake Biwa, we relocated to Kyoto, which has much more to offer in terms of sites, sounds, smells and people watching. Otsu was clearly a Japanese resort area, designed for Japanese. This meant there was little to do other than lay by the pool, bike or boat. All of these are fine recreations, but I couldn’t easily do any of these for fear of being seen skipping out on the meetings or potential dinner conversations that I was there for in the first place.

Our new diggs were a major upgrade at the Grand Prince Hotel of Kyoto. The hotel was located in the mountains, along a cedar-lined winding path. I was overcome with the fresh smell of cedar, something like jasmine and fresh, clean air (seemingly hard to find in the stifling Japanese summer). The shade of the trees and buzz of the cicadas added to the ambiance… this place was heavenly.

That evening I had to return that night for a special “congratulatory thanks and working dinner” with my fellow collaborators of the conference. I managed to navigate the transport system alone (took the subway, a rail line and a cab to get there). The dinner was traditional Japanese style, or kaiseki, in which multiple small dishes are served. It started with boiled tofu, sashimi, then sushi, tempura, Kobe beef, a pork dish, broiled salted fish, then moved on to Udon noodles, pickled Japanese vegetables, rice and concluded with some various fruits. The dinner was served over a two hour period, and I enjoyed the surprises each dish held. Although I’ve gone pretty much vegetarian over the past several months (still eat fish), I broke my self-enforced ban on meats and gave the Kobe beef a try. I’m so glad I did. The cows are massaged daily, fed beer and from all of this have the fat actually marbled into the meat, instead of separated as we see in American steaks. It literally melted in my mouth and was one of the best things I’ve ever had.

The following morning we hit the streets of Kyoto for a short time before I’d have to head back to Otsu for the evening. We went to Nijo Castle, which was first completed in 1603. Though low-lying and more functional than aesthetic, it was impressive none the less. We were mesmerized by the “nightingale” floors – the floor boards were designed to creak, making a sound that is similar to a nightingale’s song. This would alert the inhabitants of any intruders. We saw these boards at several places through out our travels.

From Nijojo we wandered the streets until we found a shopping and dining district, Teramachi. On pure accident we stumbled into a tiny sushi shop. The owner and (I think) his wife, plus one local were the only people there. They served us right on the sushi bar, and encouraged us to eat with our hands (I stuck with chopsticks, not a big fan of holding raw fish). The sushi was incredible. I’m going to miss it when I get back to the States.

My evening plans were to head back to Otsu one final night for the concluding banquet. I had been invited to sit on an honorary panel as part of a ceremony which included drumming on a beer barrel with wooden spoons. I ran out the door, walked to the subway, and jumped onto the Biwako line train just in time to make it to the dinner… so I thought. In actuality, I jumped on an express train that did not stop in Otsu, but went many kilometers beyond. Crap. It took me over an hour to get back to Kyoto, at which time it was too late for me to get a train to Otsu in time. I went back to the hotel, sad about missing the ceremony and conclusion of this project I'd been working on for more than four years.

When I got back to the hotel, I found that Jason had found ways to amuse himself while I was away, including Japanese whiskey, an in-room massage and that he had booked us for an onsen the next day. An onsen is a Japanese hot sulphar spring, and this one was on the other side of Kyoto, high in the mountains. The baths at this one were indoor, as well as outdoor, but all communal. Meaning lots of naked (though sexes are separated). I was not thrilled with this idea, given my heightened self awareness of my body (here in Japan I’m pretty much a sumo in comparison to most people). Thankfully we ran out of time so we didn’t make it up there to try it out. I didn’t know whether to be disappointed (once in a lifetime experience) or thankful (no nudity in public for me – yippee!).

The next day we woke up early and headed out once again to be Amerikajeen tourists. We stick out like sore thumbs here, and people often look at us and giggle. Some won’t sit near us on subways. I was feeling pretty self conscious about it all until I read that the Japanese are very shy and are afraid we’ll ask questions and they won’t be able to answer. Ohhh. That explains it. I’m glad I don’t stink (as much).

The weather is incredibly stifling here, hitting the 90s by 6 am or so (it gets light around 4:30). The humidity is unbelievable, and we found we broke into a sweat just walking out the doors of the hotel. We ended up walking over 8 hours that day, seeing historic sites (the Imperial castle grounds), visiting shrines and temples and stumbling into an area where Geisha still live and work. We caught a glimpse of one on the streets, but she was quickly surrounded by tourists (mostly Japanese) and squeals, and she ducked into a door and vanished as quickly as she appeared.

Journey to Japan II: Dining Fun

We haven't had much time to get out and do much here in Otsu, Shiga. Yesterday was my "big" (3 minute) speech of congratulatory welcome for the conference. I was nervous and didn't sleep a wink the night before... it's strange, because normally I'm fine with public speaking. I guess the difference was that I was on the other side of the world, speaking to an audience of which 2/3 did not speak the language I was presenting in. No pressure. I was told I did well, though, and as a result was inundated all day by smiling Japanese men who came up to me just to smile and say "Herro Kim-san" (I told them all they could call me Kim), then stand and stare at me. I get lots of attention here, that's for sure. I was self conscious most the morning, but then figured, ah, what the hell... so I'm a freak show. Might as well enjoy it!

I have received a few gifts already, and have been honored frequently by my Japanese hosts. I was feeling pretty high on life by the time our group lunch came around, but then made a bad decision in terms of seating. I sat next to someone I knew from the States, who was sitting beside a total lunatic. There were about 12 people at our table, and the lunatic proceeded to ask me about my background in microwave science (none), why I was there, etc. Clearly, he had issues about self esteem, so he was trying to make me look bad in front of my hosts and new friends. He then proceeded to tell everyone that he creates outstanding knives with handles made of microwave-dried wood (wow-wee) and that he buys mammoth ivory from Native Americans to make magic wands. Yes, he is an amateur magician. My passive-aggressive tendencies were too much for me to ignore, so I made several jokes at his expense, which others were laughing about later in the evening. Sorry buddy, messed with the wrong non-microwave-science chick.

Onward and upward... so yesterday's adventures were fairly minimal. Jason went out for long walks in the 95º+ weather with humidity making temps feel close to 110º. Then he came back for the Japanese tub, which is where I find him whenever I get back from meetings. He enjoyed being the center of attention, and said that he often had young children come up to him to say "herro" and giggle. It seems that he, too, is a freak show here.

For dinner we hit the hotel's barbecue. We had no clue what we were in store for. We were the only non-Japanese there, and it had a family, festive atmosphere. The menu, of course, was all in Japanese and our waiter and waitress didn't speak English. So we pointed to a couple of things (having no clue what they were) and tried to watch others eat so we'd know what to do.

A few moments after ordering we were served some edamame (yum! I know that one!) and cold beers that were somewhat like Miller lite in flavor. I have no clue what brand they were. Then they brought out a plate piled with all different things - steak, chicken-ish looking stuff, squid, bell peppers, cabbage, shrimp and other goodies. We tried our best to blend in and cook the stuff, then tried our hand at chopsticks. It's so much easier to eat sushi or noodles than small strips of beef with chopsticks, FYI. There was some sort of squash that looked like cantaloupe, tasted like sweet potatoes and was hard and somewhat crisp as well.

The best part was when I took a big bite of the squid's head, which apparently was attached to whatever endoskeleton thing they boast. It crunched, squirted down my throat and caused me to make a small scene while gagging on it. It tasted good, though, and I managed to recover and eat the tentacles, which I enjoyed.

I haven't seen any wildlife at all yet except for this little lovely creature that was crawling across the side walk last night.

We're now off to Kyoto, where ancient temples, castles and geisha-watching awaits. Now the fun begins! I have 2 more days of meetings, but will be skipping out on the mornings and showing up for the afternoon exhibit sessions and mandatory dinners. Tomorrow night I'm a part of a special ceremony that involves banging on beer barrels with wooden spoons. Another great honor for this silly American non-microwave scientist. Sayonara!

Side note: I have no clue what the bear means or what he is, but we see them everywhere, in big and small versions throughout the city we're in. Hmmm...

Journey to Japan, Part I: Toire, Shinkasen and Pachinko

Our trip to Japan started on Saturday morning, leaving DC to Tokyo, with a stop at JFK. JFK was oh-so-much fun to stop at - because we were on an international flight, we had to exit our arrival terminal entirely, go to another terminal, get our international tickets, go through security all over again and then get on the plane for Japan. We had an hour to do that. We rushed to the plane withonly moments to spare, only to hear the announcement that our flight was delayed. And so our adventures began...

Our plane was a big ol' 747, which is much larger than anything else I'd ever been on. Despite its size (we were on the upper deck), six hours into the trip my butt was aching and my feet had swollen twice their normal size. After a little more than 13 hours of seated pleasure, we arrived in Tokyo and navigated the airport. Thankfully, many of the signs had English letters. In fact, to be honest, it was MUCH easier to navigate than JFK was!

You can guess where my first stop was once exiting the plane. Although the rest of the airport was very "Westernized," the bathroom is where culture shock began. This was what was awaiting me in the stall. It’s a hole in the ground with a splash guard. I wore a skirt to travel in, so it was a fun way to initiate myself into the squatting technique needed to use these things. And I’ve leared a few things along the way – “toire wa doko desu ka” means "where is the toilet?". Toire (pronounced "toy-ray"... see? you can learn Japanese, too!) are quite an adventure here.

In order to get to our first hotel, we first took a local express into Tokyo. Then we had to find the bullet train (shinkansen) to Kyoto. On the shinkansen they also had the hole-in-the-ground version of toire, which I'm sure is quite difficult to use when going over 180 miles per hour. Thankfully, they also had a Western toilet, which I decided was my best bet after that long day.

From Kyoto we took a local train to Otsu, which is where we are now. We arrived there at midnight, clocking in at just over 24 hours of continous travel. I wish we had photos of the trains, the down here and such, but it gets dark at 6 p.m. here, and we were too tired to think about cameras anyway. Once checking into our hotel in Otsu, though, we were met with our next discovery in the world of toire - the automatic, seat warming, bidet style. The handle features about six buttons, all of which are marked in Japanese. We're still figuring that one out a button at a time. You can adjust the heat, jet stream, angle, water temperature and a fan turns on the minute you sit down. These, I could get used to.

After taking a shower and hitting the deep, Japanese style tub, I crashed for about 10 hours. I can see why bathing is so popular here - after a long day in 90+ degree heat and humidity unlike anything I've ever experienced before, all I can think about is that bath tub. I need one of those at home, too.

View from Prince Otsu Hotel, Lake Biwa

Today was our first full day here. I got up late, then Jason and I went and walked around Biwaka (Lake Biwa) a bit, though there's not much to see. It's interesting that 7-11s are huge here - you find them more frequently here than in the US. The tea is great, and served with every meal. Oh, and the sushi... to DIE for. Unlike anything I've had in the US. And that's just the hotel sushi. I can't wait to get more rural.

The people here are super nice and courteous. Strangers stopped to help us find our way and many tried their best to understand our miserable Japanese attempts. We visited a local grocery store, just to try it out. It was fun to see what brands are here (Fanta, Pringles, Lipton, Koka Kora...). Everything, though, is in Japanese, and it's difficult to guess what some things are. There are vending machines on every corner, but very little soda. I think most of the stuff is juice, tea and caffe au lait... but it's all in Japanese, so hard to decipher what is what. We've tried a few snack foods, but I have no clue what they are. I had some tea that tasted like hay. And I had some sort of curry for dinner that looked awful but tasted great.

During our wanderings today, we also found a Japanese arcade. We were definitely the only caucasians in the joint. I tried my hand at pachinko, which I think is something along the lines of a marriage between a ping pong machine and slot machine. I have no clue how it works or what I was doing, but it was loud, noisy and a truly Japanese thing to do, so I did it. Jason found a bongo drum virtual machine which he played with for a while. One hundred yen goes a long way in one of those places (about $1).

It is fun to be in such a different culture. Though it looks very Westernized here in terms of architecture, and even fashion, it is definitely very different from the US.

We're here on Lake Biwa for 3 days for my conference, before heading on to Kyoto, which is a very old city that was Japan's capital for over 1,000 years. Hopefully I can sneak out of conferences a bit to see more, though there really isn't much to see where we are now. I'll update as I can... it's amazing that there's no Internet easily accessible in such a technologically advanced country. Heated toilets - no WiFi - go figure!

Heading to the Other Side of the Earth

Ackh! Tomorrow I leave for DC and early Saturday morning I'm heading for the other side of the world! This thought hit me at about 11:00 today, in the midst of fighting with my fencing contractor, surveying the damage (extensive!) to my yard due to the trenching for the new plumbing in the garage and negotiating the final permit stuff with the county. How did it sneak up so quickly?

So, tonight I've been scouring the internet, picking up free sources for quick survival language (wheres' the bathroom? thank you in three differing degrees of respect and such) and trying to learn about the cultural differences. I've never been so nervous about traveling. If it was just for pleasure, that's one thing - I'm fine with being labeled "stupid American." But this is business, and I need to impress, and I have no clue what to do. I was reading up on attire and I SOOO don't fit the mold for a businesswoman in Japan (no pants, always wear high collared shirts, ugh!). Crap. I have to go shopping.

I already had been initiated in Japanese business card rituals and gift giving, so feel ok there. But then there's the issue of addressing an audience of (I think) around 300 with a welcoming message from my organization. A Japanese translator will be standing to my side, translating as I speak. I've never done anything even close to that. What do I say? How fast or slow should I speak? How do I start?

And then there's my real source of anxiety about all this - both Jason and I traveling together on the other side of the world, so far away from the girls. I always stress a little with traveling away from them - what if something should happen? This takes that stress to a whole new level - usually I travel without Jason, which makes me feel secure that at least they'd still have one parent if something should happen to me. But now it's both of us. Even worse, what if we need to get back to them quickly? The fastest we could do so is on a 16 hour flight. I know they'll be in good hands while we're away, but I HATE leaving them. I dread it.

Wish me luck! I'll post pictures and fun stuff along the way, as Internet service is available. Also, coming soon, the horrors that were once my yard.

And, on a lighter note, I spent most of yesterday on a backhoe tearing out the shrubs in front of our house. It was fun, and definitely helped me get out some tension I'd been feeling lately. I found myself prowling the yard just looking for things to tear out or dig holes for.

I-yi (whoa-oh) I'm still alive...

But barely kickin' at this hour. Thought I'd take a minute to update anyway, and to answer the bazillion questions I got about the latest crazy adventures here.

So, here goes (sorry for the brief bullet points, but it's all I've got in me tonight!)

• Japan - finally got around to making some plans! We're staying in Otsu 3 nights, Kyoto 3 nights, Mt Koya IN a Buddhist temple one night and Tokyo 3 nights. Taking a helicopter ride around Tokyo while there. Trying out Ryokan, which are Japanese-style B&B's - sleeping on mats, eating on a table just off the floor, etc. I'm finally getting excited.
• iPhone - Oh soooo money! Love it. Now to find time to really play with it.
• The New Business - It's officially (kind of) off the ground. I registered it as Three Oaks Montessori School. I'm going through the process of getting licensed by Dept of Social services. But then I hit a major snag today. Seems the county doesn't want me to have two businesses at my home. So now I have to go through a 90 day approval process which includes an appearance before the Board of Supervisors. Sweet. I definitely have the time, energy and money for this! Not to mention they want $750 just to talk to me. I heart Hanover at the moment.
• The remodel. OK, so I may have jumped the gun. I just assumed that since I own my property, I could use it, within reason, for my own purposes. I found out it isn't so (see my love of Hanover above). So I don't know if I can use my garage as a home office without paying for a very expensive permit. In fact, I found out it's been illegal all along. Not that anyone ever told me that when I called the county three years ago to register my business (which they don't do) and ask for any ordinances that may apply (of which they said were none). Even better, it was illegal for me to have employees in my home. News to me! Not one to be easily swatted aside, I am thinking of plan B already. Employees work from home, child care is in my home, family lives in one room of our home. That's legal. Or having a dozen kids living in our small home with us. Also legal. Want to build things with a wood shop in the garage? Sure, why not? Want a two-story garage to house your gun collection? Go for it. The more ammo the better. But plug in 3 computers and answer a phone? Well, that will cost ya a plenty in Hanover. You may have sensed my anger. It is only enhanced by the long afternoon in the beautiful new planning offices of Hanover county that must have costed millions to build.
  
• More on Montessori... (deep breath - ok, I'm better). So yeah, I want to do the Montessori school. Only I'm not trained, nor do I know enough to teach. Nor do I want to be a teacher. I'm fine with helping, though. So I'm looking for a part-time teacher. No bites yet. Let me know if you know of someone in VA! This would enable me to be close to Sadie, fill a need in our community in terms of quality preschool offerings (currently slim to none) and possibly make a buck in a few years, if I stick with it. Cross your fingers for me folks, it's going to be a bumpy ride.
• The "other" business. Yes, I'm still keeping it. I love my microwave scientists and am excited about the changes my other client is making to their organizational structure. I want to see them through. And I like my travel a few times a year. Call me a bad mommy if you will, but I need those adult "breaks" (even though it's usually stressful and full of work), and I thrive on accomplishment.
  
• Katie hates her preschool this summer. It sucks. It is SOOO not Montessori. Her teacher yells, tells the kids they're doing things "wrong" all the time and is generally a cranky old biddy who shouldn't be around children. Or adults. Only a few weeks left. Other than that she's great. She's a total chunk at the moment (around 55 lbs!) so I have a feeling the growth spurt is coming any day. She's always been that way - out then up, out then up... She has a new friend at school. He's not a boyfriend yet she tells me. But he's very cute. Uh oh. Oh, and the Alvin and the Chipmunks CD? Avoid it at all costs.
  
• Sadie is finally talking. And it's coming more and more every day. She's putting sentences together. I soo love this age. She's got these huge brown eyes that stops everyone in their tracks wherever I take her. I have no idea how many times they tell me she's a little angel. How little they know!!
• Spider bite - after spreading toxins throughout my body, it's finally on the mend. I felt like crap for quite a while. And I had these fun lines of poison that surfaced in various parts of my body. The spots on my leg are healing well, and shouldn't leave very big scars. While cleaning out the office for the remodel, we found a ginormous black widow with tons of sacs and smaller widows around her. I'm wondering if that's what it could have been? No clue.
• Pick up sticks with yellow jackets - Our remodel started Thursday, so I found myself moving out the rest of the office and garage storage stuff Wednesday night. Jason conveniently developed pneumonia (he's still recovering), and my employees were not eager to work overtime for some odd reason. While cleaning out the back shed area that had never been cleaned out since we moved in, I discovered multiple hives of yellow jackets. I'd pick up a board to move it, a swarm would come out. I'd pick up another, a new swarm. I was out there at midnight, in 90 degree weather, with jeans, a leather jacket, a scarf wrapped around my head and armed with two cans of bee killer. I'd move a stick, spray like all hell as I backed out of there, wait a minute and do it again. It only took me 4 hours to clear out an 8 x 10 area. After all the yellow jackets were dead I discovered the paper wasps. Good times.
• The Universalist Unitarians - I went again. It was interesting, and I learned more about their "religion." I dig their creeds and liberal structure, but still don't think I'm ready for organized religion. I may go from time to time just for some mental stimulation. I just don't do the group stuff well. I do like how mission-based they are, and how many they help in the community and beyond. Very cool.
  

Feast or Famine

Last week I think I had blog entries almost every day. Not so much this week. Here's why...

• Answered my SAHM vs. Not to SAHM dilemma. I decided to open a business. Another one. A Montessori preschool to be more precise. Yes, I am certifiably insane. In order to do this, we must completely remodel the garage into living space, to the tune of thousands of bucks. All prior to September 1. In the last 4 days I've met with close to 50 contractors, helpers and handymen. Fun stuff. Wednesday the work begins!
  
• Making plans for Japan. Well, at least realizing the trip is only two weeks away and I have no clue where I'm staying, what I'm doing or how to get around. Or how to speak the language well enough to find a bathroom. Uh Oh. Anyone have a Japanese version of Rosetta Stone laying around they don't need for a month or so? Any one know how to say toilet in Japanese?
  
• Sampled Universalist Unitarianism. Interesting.
• Got bitten by a brown recluse (they think?) and have marks on my leg where the doctor burned out a few small bits of dead skin left behind. Have cool bumps that pop out along various parts of my body following the lines of veins. Right hand has several puss-filled bumps on the interior of the fingers. Got three steroid shots on the "meatiest" portion of my body. Have been taking a barrage of antibiotics and steriods.
  
• Got rid of the shakes, sweats, night terrors, brain zaps and other fun things that went along with my drug withdrawals. Did I mention Cymbalta sucks?

So, yeah, I'm kinda busy this week.

The 4th (and 5th... and 3rd...)

Last week I was exhausted, so I played hookie a half-day on the 3rd to get ready for a fun, extended weekend with the girls. Here are a few of my favorite memories from our long-overdue family time...

Wendesday, July 3rd. Hat Day!!

Just a few of the many hats we gathered and played with. As a bonus, I discovered that I have a living, breathing garden gnome in our home, which should help satisfy my desire to go out and buy a ceramic one for my yard.


July 4th Fun at Casa Thies

We spent the day listening to Katie beg us to "do fireworks" and Sadie scream for no reason, which she often does to keep us on our toes. I felt like crap all day (thank you, Lilly drug company), so we stayed home and created our own festivities. The evening ended with our discovery that Sadie is terrified of whistling fireworks, Carly likes to eat discarded firework containers and that fireworks that "shoot flaming fireballs" are illegal in Virginia for a darn good reason. Thankfully, it had rained just before we set that one off... the singed leaves that fell down from the sky were easy to stamp out in the damp grass.

Whee! Mommy managed to talk us into matching, patriotic outfits!

The moonbounce... always a hit in our household.

Well, until mommy gets in, gracefully hitting the vent tube and the whole thing collapses.
Then it's just funny, not so much "fun."


July 5, The Tomato Festival

For the first time in the three years that we've lived in Bubbasville, we braved the natives and tried out the local Tomato Festival. I enjoyed camouflage watching (I can still see you, people!), the plethora of churches trying to push water on me in exchange for my soul, and watching the many ways in which people displayed some nifty confederate flag stickers that proclaimed "I support national Confederacy month." One very pregnant woman Jason encountered had a sticker on each... well, use your imagination. Good times.

My parents joined us for the humid outing, and despite the stress involved in taking small children out, we managed to create a few nice memories while there.

Mom stops to cheese it up with the girls and Mark Warner, US Senate candidate and previous VA governor. I don't think she realized he's a fairly liberal democrat (did you, Mom?! wahahahaha). Warner was rumored to be a VP consideration by Obama, but he declined, citing his desire to have more time with his family than that position would allow. So, instead, he was sweating his butt off at our hillbilly fair in order to garner a few votes. Yet another reason why I will never enter politics.

Katie fed a donkey at the petting zoo area, and the donkey became her new best friend. He followed her everywhere, nuzzling her for another scratch behind the ears and more food. I so wanted to take him home with us. The neighbors would LOVE it! Katie agreed, but Jason was having no part of that discussion. Sadie, meanwhile, spent time kissing and hugging a calf, mooing softly to it. If only I could get her to be that sweet to her sister.

In the midst of all of the festivities, a photographer walked up and asked if he could take photos of the girls while they decorated tomatoes. I got an email today, and it seems that we are once again "featured" in our local paper... yeeee haww! Not only that, I think we made the front page news. And, my mug on this shot is MUCH worse than my last one in this exciting publication. At least the girls looked adorable. Jason and I looked angry and uninterested. Which is probably accurate, but all the same... front page?! Ugh.

It's official - I think I have to admit we're now locals. But you'll never see camouflage, rebel flags or big bangs adorning on this Bubbaite!

Check Yourself (and pass it on...)

Pass it on...

In memory of PunkRockMommy, I’m doing one simple thing today, and I’m asking you to do it too. If you have breasts, would you please take a moment in the shower today to check yourself for any lumps, redness, swelling, dimpling, or other changes? The graphic above (from Worldwide Breast Cancer) illustrates 12 examples of a worrisome change. Please check yourself today, and call your doctor if you see or feel a lump or one of these changes below.

Peace, PunkRockMommy

Since beginning my blogging adventures almost two years ago, I've come across many blogs that I've fallen in love with. When a friend was diagnosed with breast cancer about a year ago, I began looking at a few of her fellow cancer fighters sites, hoping for hints on ways to help, to understand. One of them, along the way, is one that was kept by a offbeat, fun and funky mom of six who was diagnosed with breast cancer just about a year ago. PunkRockMommy became one of my favorite lurking haunts.

Today, PunkRockMommy passed away. Her husband has promised to keep the blog alive with posts on the family's coping and growth after her death. But the blogosphere will be empty without her presence.

Rest in peace, Andrea. Thank you for sharing your life, and death, with total strangers. It brought about an entirely new perspective for many.

I have to go wake up my kids and hug them...

Independence Day

I seem to be on a roll this week with the blogging, so figured I'd let my thoughts tonight flow into cyberspace.

I try to stay a-political for the most part, especially concerning US politics, but this year I find that my panties are in a bit of a wad. It could be that I just finished paying off the IRS more than 33% of my company's total income in employment taxes, or maybe that we were royally screwed by "the system" when my daughter faced a life-threatening illness. Maybe it's because I've been so disillusioned with America in the past few years that I hate to even admit I'm from the US when traveling or meeting with international colleagues and friends. I'm sick of the cowboy image, but equally sick of the political process itself. So, it's pretty easy to venture that I've been thrilled to see that the generation behind mine is no longer 'waiting for the world to change,' but is actually pursuing a better idea of government. It's exciting. It yields new hope in my heart for the land we live in.

What struck me today, though, is that this time of change, this need and desire to reinvent our government isn't anything new. It's cyclical, and even needed, as evidenced from the very document that we celebrate today, our Declaration of Independence.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.–That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, –That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness.

Part philosophy, part politics, the Declaration is truly, in my mind, one of the greatest documents ever written. I try to dust it off (via Google search and Wikipedia of course) each year or so around this time and review, to remind myself what the US was founded on.

I have a wide variety of friends, and many are strong conservatives. As you may have guessed, I am not. Thus, I keep my mouth shut for the most part, listen to their points of view, then research them on my own. And develop my own ideas. And I like to think I'm constantly evolving in these ideas (I hate to say they are beliefs – as said so eloquently in Kevin Smith's Dogma, ideas can be changed, but beliefs can not).

OK, I'm rambling. What I'm trying to get at, is that dusting off the Declaration every once in a while is a necessity for each of us as vested citizens of our country, no matter what your beliefs, ideas or views are. As US citizens, it's our duty.

As I get older, I find my "ideas" are congealing a bit, and that it is harder to see other points of view. So one of my many personal goals this year was to search harder, reach a bit further, and find some new perspectives, open myself up to some new philosophies and see if I can update some of my "ideas."

If you're in the US celebrating our nation's birthday tonight, my wish for you this coming year is the same... openness to new ideas, willingness to contribute and that the (currently rhetorical, but hopefully one day inacted) desire for change is not just a flash in the pan, but an earnest yearning and movement to create improvement in our government system. Happy 4th of July!

(Yep, time to figure out where to go to get my Masters degree in social responsibility. I'm so ready, can't you tell!!)

Oh, yeah... it's always been this way!

My good friend Jen, out of sunny CA, called today to commiserate with my recent experiences with the children. Seems that she can relate as her daughter recently stuck a wooden QTip in her toddler brother's ear (far enough to land them in urgent care), as well as gave their kitty's whiskers a very short trim. All in one day. Thank God I'm not alone in all of this.

Jen also reminded me that this Katie-mess-making stuff is not so new, as evidenced from an old email she forwarded to me today. To think this was written almost EXACTLY three years ago to the date (sigh)...

Recipe for Disaster:

1 container Vaseline
1 bottle Baby Powder
A few dashes of Baby Oil
1 Extra Large bottle of Baby Lotion
A two-and-a-half-year old

Place all ingredients in a room unsupervised for 15 minutes. Be sure that it is very quiet in the room before entering it, otherwise the recipe is not working correctly.

Enter room to find mixture of the ingredients throughout the room, rubbed evenly in the carpet, on the walls, curtains, back of a rocking chair and evenly distributed throughout the toddler's hair. IMPORTANT: You will want to clean, but this mixture is impenetrable. Let dry a few hours until carpet changes to a dingy color.

After carpet is adequately ruined, walls are stained and the toddler's hair has been washed using shampoo, baking soda and other home remedies, you should have a disaster well on its way. Now dry the toddler's hair, put cornstarch in it to bring out the Vaseline, and you should have a complete disaster, such as the one pictured here.

We recently tried this recipe for Complete Disaster in our home just after placing our house on the market and it worked wonderfully. We also found that similar results can be achieved by substituted lipstick and eyeshadow for baby powder and Vaseline, which we tried on our Open House day. Enjoy!

Not much has changed since the last use of the recip... but I will let you know that you can exponentially increase the quantity of COMPLETE DISASTER if you add another child to the recipe.

Not what I had planned...

I awoke this morning, once again, to chaos and disaster. This time the girls had taken the newly purchased DragonBerry Shampoo and Blueberry Burst Body Wash and lathered everything from waist-height down on the lower level of our house into bubbles (or at least applied a slimy film which would later be "bubbled"). Seriously, what did I do in my past life to deserve this retribution?!

Every baby doll, both dogs, the coffee table, all the Disney plasticine toys, the Shliech animals, the bathroom sink, floor and both girls' lower extremeties were covered in the sticky goo. "But Mommy," Katie told me as I repressed a scream of rage as I realized the magnitude of the latest morning disaster, "We didn't go outside. And now the house smells good." I rinsed and washed, producing even more bubbles (much to their delight) and still found a spot on the carpet that is deeply stained with shampoo. I ran the steam vac over it this afternoon only to... you guessed it... produce more bubbles.

I threatened Katie with an eternity of time out if she makes one SINGLE other mess before I can hit the bottom of the stairs in the morning. Double eternity if she lets Sadie out of her crib. Her reply? Sadie can get out on her own now. Oh crap.

I never got a chance to memorialize George Carlin, one of my all-time favorite comedians who passed away last week. I did so this morning by muttering, thinking or screaming into a pillow six of the seven dirtiest words from his old 70's routine. The 7th word just didn't apply, or I would have used that one, too.

To make it all even better, I'm having some hellacious withdrawals from a medication I started a couple of months ago. When I had Katie, I began to suffer from anxiety attacks (though I didn't know that is what they were at the time). I did some medications back then for a few months, got my head screwed on straight again, and weaned off of them. I'd been able to control them since (now knowing what they were and how they came on) on my own, but in March they began to rear their ugly head once again. I wonder why? That was about the time the girls started their early morning escapades. So, I went to my primary care "nurse" (do doctors still exist?) and asked for something to help me along for a while. She gave me Cymbalta.

Two drugged-out weeks later I started having weird symptoms. Increased anxiety (but no panic attacks) and newly onset depression that I'd never before experienced. Insomnia. Cold sweats. Hot flashes. Irritability (yes, I can be worse!). Constipation like a... well, like it was not good. Then last week in New Orleans it doubled, and I added the shakes to the list. Enough was enough, so I quit. Cold turkey. I had only been on it for about 50 days, so figured I'd do every other day for a week and stop.

Now I have more fun symptoms. Night terrors (which I've never had before). Aching all over. Sharp pains in my legs and feet. Blurry vision. Extreme fatigue. Chills. What the heck?! I looked it all up online tonight and found out that these are all fairly common withdrawal symptoms from Cymbalta. I should have known, given my (and my kids') history with meds. I'm about to go the Tom Cruise route and get all psycho about pharmaceuticals. Tomorrow I get to visit with the lovely nurse who suggested this route toward wellness. I can't wait. She has no idea what she's in for. If I'm in a padded room by the end of the day, please promise to visit and wear a sunny yellow color to cheer me up.

So yeah. After being home for two nights full of night terrors, bathroom visits and incessant sweating, I'm awoken to what looks like a slime attack from a Ghostbusters flick. The devil mommy on one shoulder was oh so close to convincing me to spank them both and send them to bed, as advised in nursery rhymes and by most parents with more than 5 children. But angel-Montessori-loving mommy on the other side balanced her out and the girls ended up with a stern admonishment, a few timeouts throughout the day as required and the threat of eternal timeout and no-playdates-ever-again for Katie should she ever decide to do this again.

Please, please, let the threats work. I need a morning off!!!

Microwave science and the Big Easy

Last Sunday, my two staff members (my sister, K and employee/friend, A) loaded up the Expedition for a trip to New Orleans. The road trip would take about 16 hours each way, so they decided to start it off with a bang - by writing cute slogans about our clients on the back and sides of the truck to amuse passing motorists. We discovered that people who drive Prius' LOVE microwave science. Also, several truckers got a kick out of Maxwell's equation. Who knew?

Many hours later, we found ourselves having dinner in Newnan, GA. The waitresses all welcomed us with a resounding "Haaayyyyy!" each time we'd enter from our outdoor table to use the restroom. We stopped for the night in beautiful Greenville, AL, which boasted two empty drug stores, a WinDixie that didn't open until 10 a.m. on Mondays, the world's smallest WalMart and a white shack with a sign that said it was Bush's headquarters. Not surprising in the least. We frequently giggled at the names of the local Alabama sites... Shorter, Pine Apple (two words), as well as the "famous" Hank Williams shrine and, of course, roadkill armadillos. Sadly, the armadillos were the most exciting thing to see during that long stretch.

The second day on the road went quickly, and we were surprised to find ourselves amidst the devastation of Hurricane Katrina so far from New Orleans. The Mississippi coastline was littered with demolished warehouses, uninhabitable apartment complexes, still-tarped single family homes and what looked like grave yards of concrete slabs that used to support houses. I had heard of the destruction, realized we may see some of the aftermath, but never in a million years expected to see the level of devastation... especially three years after the hurricane had hit the area.

The destruction continued well into New Orleans, until we found ourselves close to the French Quarter, which had been spared from the storm's destruction, but was worse for the wear. A block from our hotel we observed pimps and prostitutes, looted storefronts, empty-eyed homeless and barely-standing low-cost housing. From the point where our hotel started (Bourbon/Canal/Iberville block), the area seemed to look more-or-less as I remembered it... dirty, colorful, smelly, loud and full of excitement. We dropped off our bags and headed into the Quarter, where I was dismayed to see teenage girls clustered outside of "gentlemen's" (ha!) clubs in broad daylight, barely clad, and even more disheartened to see some so clearly lost to this world. By the end of Bourbon Street I had thought the city was no longer worth a visit, but as we turned onto Royal Street, my heart began to patter with excitement at seeing my favorite artists' galleries still present, the smell of Cajun foods and the sights and sounds of one of the US's oldest and most authentic cities. Man, I love New Orleans.

We stopped by the Riverwalk for a hurricane and some fried onions and chatted with a local bartender who had lived all her life in New Orleans. When the hurricane hit, her family had invested 20 years of their 30-year mortgage into their home. They had flood insurance, thoughmost of her neighborhood did not as they were close to a levy (deemed by FEMA as safe, thus removing the requirement for homeowners insurers in the area to require flood coverage). The flood coverage paid out the last 10 years of her mortgage. Twenty years of investment, along with all personal valuables and belongings, were lost. And she felt like she was one of the lucky ones. They rebuilt, and stayed. Most of her neighborhood left, and she didn't think they'd ever be back. It made me stop for a moment, and thank my lucky stars for all I have.

The next day we woke early and scurried about getting ready for the symposium, board meetings and other "real" reasons we were there. By three we were free again for a few hours, and jumped aboard the St Charles trolley to the Garden District and Magazine. K and A were mesmerized by the overwhelming smells of jasmine and roses and the towering, century old crepe myrtles and twisted magnolias that hung over the streets. We enjoyed peeping into the gardens of the antebellum mansions and perused the LaFayette Cemetary #1 to check out the infamous above-ground vaults of the long-dead. On Magazine we found a Mexican dive and imbibed in a margarita and taco salad before heading back to get ready for an evening of riveting discussion at a board meeting for our microwave science group. The meeting was held at the Red Fish Grill, which was pretty good, but overly loud, slow and boasting obnoxious waiters who called you "sweetie" and "dear" while bustling about doing everything in the world to avoid actual service of the customers.

On Wednesday our conference started, and we enjoyed catching up with our favorite international scientists, technical sales folks and other greats in the field of electromagnetic energy. We developed a few new nicknames (our favorite pastime at these events) for some newly introduced characters (Cookie Monster, Dracula, the Mercenary, Milton), as well as some who had not yet been inducted into our nickname hall of fame (McGyver, Romanian Thong-Slinger, Dirty FrenchMan)... all while lamenting those that were missing this year from our list of favorites (WonkEye, YaccoBlech and BigHead).

Thursday brought another breathtaking day of discoveries in microwave energy applications, followed by an even more exciting private dinner cruise on the Mississippi River. I made the mistake of feeling sorry for K and A's lack of New Orleans experiences in the trip thus far, and let them off the hook from the event so that they could find their own trouble in the Quarter while I herded about two dozen scientists, researchers and their wives and children down the winding streets to the river. I laughed aloud at the thought of the blog entry I had hoped to write that night, devoted strictly to directing the group through five blocks. Herding cats, indeed. The group, however, were even more conversationally challenged than I could have imagined, and I was exhausted by the mental anguish I'd suffered during my four hours aboard the smoky, creaking boat and went straight to bed. Not to mention the stuff they tried to serve on board that they called a "Creole feast." I ate nothing but white rice and a roll. That good.

Friday was the last day of our event, and I had the girls packing before noon so that we could make an escape the minute the conference wrapped up. During our closing reception, I invited an acquaintance to join us for dinner, Dirty Frenchman overheard and invited himself, and then we decided to invite one more to make it an even number. We rushed to close the exhibit area, pack and get ready for our one night on the town. We wandered through the Quarter until our dinner reservations, which were set at 9:30 p.m. at Emerill LaGasse's NoLa restaurant. THAT was worth eating a week's worth of steamboat cruise crap to have. I had the shrimp and grits, and it was to DIE for.

Our company for the night was beyond entertaining. Our party was something one would use to begin a joke... "Three American girls went out with an Italian, a Canadian Frenchman and a guy from Omaha for dinner...". The Italian introduced us to the finer points of grappe (I could find no finer points, but was introduced none the less), and we enjoyed a stimulating conversation that covered everything taboo in normal gatherings - from religion to politics (I found this week that Europeans are enthralled with current US politics) to music to, well, we covered it all before being booted from the restaurant at midnight. We found ourselves wandering the streets of the Quarter the rest of the night, taking in some jazz and blues, and finally landed at our hotel's courtyard pool (where the Romanian thong-flinger made her debut). We were all sad when we finally had to call it quits at 5:30 a.m. to hit our beds for a few hours sleep before heading out the next morning on our respective return trips home. I can't remember the last time I've had so much fun - it's been at least a few years.


The next morning K, A and I loaded up the truck and headed out of the city. I was a bit worse for the wear that morning and drifted in and out of consciousness in back until we hit Alabama. The rest of our day was a lot of fun as we discussed and rediscussed our previous night, the new characters in our "play" and the sights, sounds and smells from their first trip to the Big Easy. In Atlanta we hit a major traffic jam, but we thoroughly enjoyed it as we blasted Neal Diamond's "Sweet Caroline" (much to the amusement of local Hotlantans), took pictures of a General Lee replica on I-85 and developed television plots based upon our new "characters" (e.g. The Microwave Mafia, Electromagnetic Survivor (6 microwave scientists stuck in a lab with no way out), and The Ultimate Warrior). We spent the night on the border of Georgia and South Carolina and found a real-live drivethru that the local teens actually hung out at. All in all, a good day of travel.

I wish I could say yesterday was as exciting, but we were done. We'd had all the fun we could possibly squeeze out of a scientific conference, Mad Libs and 20-Questions, and drove most of the remainder of the way in silence, trying to find a decent radio station since the CD player burned out in the truck. We were back home at 8 p.m. and K and A departed before the truck was even in Park. I was thrilled, however, to get back to my kids, both human and furry.

Next up... Japan. I'm excited, especially knowing now that some of my favorite characters from last week will be there (Romanian Thong-Slinger, Cookie Monster and more!).

On a side note, check out these awesome digs in Richmond for rent... what a bargain.

Kicking Off the Summer

Summer has barely started, but we've been busy.

Katie's preschool days are officially over, and she graduated near the end of May. I'd be lying if I didn't say that I'm a bit sad... she just seems to be growing up too quickly. Since graduation she's also finished up a season of soccer (and received her first-ever trophy, which she is SOOO proud of), had a ballet recital, stayed a week with her cousins and grandparents, went to a local amusement park with a friend and has still found lots of time to climb the walls and tell me how bored she is. This is week 3 of summer. Here's a few photo updates of our fun...

The Dora-The-Hooker Dress. Here it is. The most hideous children's apparel ever conceived. Notice the black and white polka-dots. Purple, lime green and orange stripes on the skirt, completed with pink tights and ballet slippers. And, you can't see it well here, but there's a round disk pinned to her head that matches. For this costume, we paid $60. Would I do it again? In a heartbeat.

At both her rehearsal and recital I held back tears derived from laughter. The little ones were just so cute, it was almost unbearable. Of course Katie's class had the ugliest dresses ever imagined. The other prima ballerinas had gorgeous, poofy dresses that reminded one of sugarplums, flowers, and childhood dreams of fairy land.

Katie's reminded me of women that I've seen working the streets in Tijiuana.



Dressing Herself. Sadie's all about doing everything herself these days. She picks out her own clothes most days and screams the others when I insist she wear something that is presentable outside of the house.

Here we see her wearing her very FAVORITE thing in the world - the Gap Rainbow Jacket. The Gap Rainbow Jacket is worn even on 100 degree days with humitures over 110. I don't fight it. I figure she'll take it off if she gets hot enough.

Her other favorites are also in use in this photo. Notice the poofy, flowery skirt. It has matching knickers that she loves to show anyone who wants to see them. And the black, shiny shoes with rhinestones. This girl loves the bling.

She is very particular about her clothing, and once she chooses a favorite, I have to be sure to wash it at least twice weekly... she won't go anywhere without it.


Popsicles and the Pool. Jason's only request for Father's Day was that we spent the day together relaxing. We had planned a trip to the amusement park, but skipped out when it got too hot outside. Instead, our entire family enjoyed a great day outside. The girls lounged in the pool, sucking on popsicles, until they decided to get rowdy and drench mommy and daddy with the water that is now no longer in the pool. It was a nice relaxing day - one we rarely share together, with all four of us just enjoying the outdoors and each other's company. I hope for many more days like this this summer!

Why I'm frustrated with my career choice

This week I've attended over a dozen meetings for a handful of organizations, in person and via teleconference. And I only worked part-time most days.

I have enjoyed my career choice for years, but things are changing, fast. The issue with my job is that I have outdated organizations - stuck in beauracracy. They are lost to the impact millenials are already having on the need for collaborative identity of the organization (as opposed to old-school, board-dictated identity). I've mentioned the Obama campaign a dozen of times this week as an illustration of this change - how new technology (for example Web 2.0) is an indicator of major change in the world of nonprofits... in the way we communicate, in how people perceive an organization, and, most importantly, that the stakeholders of the organizations (whether they are consumers, members, leaders or volunteers) will define in their own way what an organization is, despite the leadership's best attempts to retain hierarchy and decide what is "best" for their flock. C'mon folks, get with the program already, before it's too late! Sheesh.

I was trying to soothe my aching head and jangled nerves tonight by diving into my favorite blogosphere spots when I came across this gem...

From a declassified CIA manual on Simple Sabotage, circa 1944, to create general interference with organizations:

• Insist on doing everything through “channels.” Never permit short-cuts to be taken in order to expedite decisions.
• Make “speeches.” Talk as frequently as possible and at great length. Illustrate your “points” by long anecdotes and accounts of per sonal experiences. Never hesitate to make a few appropriate “patriotic” comments.
• When possible, refer all matters to committees, for “further study and considera tion.” Attempt to make the committees as large as possible — never less than five.
• Bring up irrelevant issues as frequently as possible.
• Haggle over precise wordings of communications, minutes, resolutions.
• Refer back to matters decided upon at the last meeting and attempt to re-open the question of the advisability of that decision.
• Advocate “caution.” Be “reasonable” and urge your fellow-conferees to be “reason able” and avoid haste which might result in embarrassments or difficulties later on.
• Be worried about the propriety of any decision — raise the question of whether such action as is contemplated lies within the juris diction of the group or whether it might conflict with the policy of some higher echelon.

That so clearly sums up my meetings this week, and makes it official... the CIA is infiltrating my clients' leadership and governing structures, ready to sabotage my best attempts to lead them into a new era. Sabotage, I tell you!

Or, maybe I just need a vacation.

Another Mixed Bag

Renewed Ban on Walmart. Due to the need to penny pinch thanks to ever inflating gas prices and the inability to get rid of our gas-guzzling SUV, I broke my promise and headed to my most hated, dreaded, local W. I finally justified my hiatus from shopping there - not a penny saved. I spent quite a while perusing, carefully seeking bargains. What I found is that my beloved Targét is MUCH less expensive in most areas - kids clothes (and much more stylish), snack foods, toiletries and diapers to name the big ones. Yay - I can once again justify my hatred of the ugly side of big business!

Preschool Ballet Rocks. More to come on that in a later post, when I load the photos and video. Let's just say I cried my eyes out... from laughter. It was well worth every penny invested in the hideous, Dora the Hooker costume for that one hour of comedy.

Yackity Yack. Sadie's talking up a storm these days. Today she got a scrape on her knee. Tonight she told me as I changed her "Mama, I Bad Boo Boo Knee" clear as a bell. She's 21 months in 2 days. She loves to boss Katie around... "TahTay, BAFF!" "TahTay, KeenUp!" and "TahTay, go ny-ny."

Japan is ON! Yep... it's definite... I'm going in 8 weeks!

More requests for your energy/thoughts/prayers:

• Amanda is back in the big house for another intensive round of chemo in an effort to wipe out the leukemia cells that survived the first round. Also, it looks like she's facing bone marrow transplant in the near future. Stay strong, 'Manda!
  
• Jameson is back home and healing after a successful Fontan (heart surgery). Hooray!
• Harlie goes in tomorrow for her jaw reconstruction. Good luck, Harlie, and hang in there, Christy!!!!